Assertiveness & Boundaries

Self-advocacy, saying no, managing expectations, and breaking people-pleasing patterns. Builds the underlying assertiveness that makes difficult conversations and honest feedback possible.

What's inside

This collection works in the gap between knowing what you want to say and actually saying it. It covers 9 topics across five stages. Each topic includes a micro lesson, blind spots, journal prompts, and a five-day habit builder.

The five stages:

Understanding Your Patterns — Why assertiveness feels risky, the beliefs underneath people-pleasing and conflict avoidance, the four communication styles, and identifying your default.

Setting Boundaries — What a boundary actually is and isn't, the difference between a boundary and a demand, practising small boundaries daily, and holding them when tested.

Assertive Communication — Stating needs without apologising, removing verbal hedges, disagreeing without aggressing, and letting your statements stand.

Managing Pushback — What happens when people don't like your new patterns, why the system resists when you change the implicit contract, and staying assertive under emotional pressure.

Sustaining the Shift — Moving assertiveness from conscious skill to automatic habit, catching the creep back into over-accommodation, and embedding daily practice.

How to use this collection

As a structured programme, work through sequentially over five to seven weeks. The arc builds deliberately — understanding patterns before setting boundaries, setting boundaries before communication, skills before managing pushback.

For targeted coaching, each stage works independently. Pull just Setting Boundaries for a client who can't hold the line, or Assertive Communication for someone whose directness needs refining.

As preparation for a specific situation, use the Pre-Conversation Preparation tool to prepare for any conversation requiring assertiveness.

Available to registered Coaching Workspace members. You'll be asked to sign in if you're not already.